Pitching: Do You Have a Biscuit Strategy?
by Startacus Admin
Pitching: Do You Have a Biscuit Strategy?
This is it. You’ve done your research, studied each attendee’s LinkedIn profile and double checked your figures. But what happens when talking fails? What have you got up your sleeve? Your trump card? I am of course talking about the choice of biscuits. Never mind blue chip investment. This is choc chip investment and you need to make sure that you are one step ahead of the game. Choose your biscuit strategy carefully.
Digestives: The Equity Hogger
A traditional, understated, yet tasty choice. A clear message from the outset that you like to hold on to your capital instead of shedding cash for a more risky choice of biccy. In the current financial climate there are no room for risks and the digestive has held its market share since 1876.
Good for: Financial Institutions, Insurance
Bad for: Creative Agencies, the Catering Industry
Chocolate Hobnobs: The Unexpected Roadblock
You’ve lured them in with a slick marketing video featuring that guy from Season 3 of Big Brother and promises of a viral social media campaign but now you have to break it to them that there isn’t as huge a demand for your brand of puppy pyjamas as you thought. You need leverage and you need it fast. Stem the impending range with a nice chocolate hobnob. Appealing and visually pleasing on top, but with a tendency to crumble - just like your business plan. They’ll be too busy wiping crumbs from their shirt that they won’t bother wiping the tears from their eyes.
Good for: Failed Social Networks
Bad for: Charities, Retail
Jammy Dodgers: The Optimist
Sticky, delicious and memorable, just like your company slogan. There isn’t another biscuit out there that conveys quite the same literal optimism as an actual jam filled smile. Be careful though not to associate yourself with the colloquial meaning of ‘jammy’ - this is not a stroke of luck, just the beginning of a sweet sweet series of deals.
Good for: Media Production Companies
Bad for: Textiles and Clothing Industries
Party Rings: The done deal
This meeting is just a formality. Don’t however become complacent, nothing has been signed. When the Head of Business Development drops a bombshell on you, it’s not going to look fantastic that you’ve got your feet up on the table and a party ring on each finger. He’s presented a big plate of chocolate Hobnobs, and you know it’s going to be a long afternoon.
Good for: Previously completed deals, established contacts
Bad for: New partnerships, Funeral Directors
If you are looking for more practical (and useful) pitching advice that can really make a difference to your business, head over to The Pitch website - Britains biggest small business competition. They are currently open for entries, but you have to act quick as the deadline is 13th July.
In my next blog post, I’ll be looking at the best chair to use when chairing a meeting…
If you like what you see here on Startacus, why not become a member of our growing community? It's free! And you'll get all this - exclusive access to our Business Toolkit, discounts and offers galore for your business via our member only business deals, the chance to network and connect with loads of fellow self-starters, and maybe even become our celebrated 'Self-Starter of the Week' and tell the world your startup tale! Join right here for free
Subscribe to our newsletter
If you would like to receive our startup themed newsletter, full of the latest startup opportunities, events, news, stories, tips and advice, then sign up here.
Bubblebum has had its flagship product named as one of the Most Innovative and Most Attractive at the Child Baby & Maternity Expo in China.
Influencer marketing remains largely unchartered territory for many businesses, so here are some tips for getting it right on the first go.
Step forward Raise Accelerator, Northern Ireland's first privately-run startup accelerator. We chatted to three founders from their first cohort.
Rich Maaghul, CEO of ODEM.io explores the future of education and how disruption will transform the way that we learn...
The app that helps you achieve your goal body with easy to follow workouts for the gym or home.
The ethical rewards app Koin Rewards, reimagining loyalty through responsible shopping and tokenisation.
Lessons from Goldilocks and the three bears and why in a competitive market place just-right doesn’t go far enough
Common costly mistakes when hiring a team. Use this advice to help avoid high hiring costs, low workplace morale and mistakes.
Productivity can be positively impacted by employee engagement and workplace culture. Jonathan Richards, CEO and co-founder at Breathe, explains...
The startup that's motivating older people and people with dementia to be physically active...
Published on: 30th June 2014
If you would like to enable commenting via your Startacus account, please enable Disqus functionality in your Account Settings.
- IAG’s Hangar 51 takes flight with latest innovation programme 31st Jul 2019 The latest Hangar 51 innovation programme is on the hunt for tech startups with a broad range of aviation industry solutions.
- 10 FMCG startups selected for first Seedrs accelerator 24th Jul 2019 10 FMCG startups selected for the 1st Seedrs FMCG accelerator, which aims to help FMCG startups raise capital on the platform
- Startup Leadership Program invites applications for its 9th London cohort 12th Jul 2019 The Startup Leadership Program continues to grow, inviting applications for its 9th London cohort to join the six-month program.
- Latest Zinc Company Builder Programme to transform the quality of later life 9th Jul 2019 Do you want to build a new purpose-driven startup with support from a world-class network of experts?
