As a startup founder, which FRIENDS character are you?

by Startacus Admin

There comes a point in every week where the futility of maintaining reason, logic and purpose becomes abundantly apparent...at Startacus we call this point ‘Friday’.

So today to celebrate the waning of the week in ‘style’ we shall now tackle, what I'm sure you’ll agree is one of the most pressing issues for the modern startup, ‘If you (as a startup founder) were a Friends character, which Friends character would you be?’

Now I know what you are thinking “For shame Startacus team- how can you allow yourselves to sink to such depths of publishing nonsense and hokum?!” But fear not dear self starter, for in true Startacus style, this offering conforms not to your typical arbitrary web analysis of meaningless personality traits, but is based on exhaustive research and painstaking scientific explorations… hmm hmm!

Now that that’s out of the way, we may proceed…

Phoebe Buffay - You are a startup founder who prefers a more holistic approach with everything that you do, with a quicky and often ‘devil may care’ attitude that belies surprising passion and determination. Fond of cats, your workplace is a welcome sanctuary for the less, shall we say ‘mainstream’ people of the startup species, where imagination finds a home, corporate values are forbidden and music/songs are a mandatory aspect of the working day. Your business is most likely to be a social enterprise - probably in connection with an obscure member of the animal kingdom which is under threat from an equally obscure problem - rescuing silverfish from the perils of shower drain hair conditioner, perhaps. Founder’s Quote “ If you want to receive emails about my upcoming venture, send me some money so I can buy a computer”.

Monica Geller - You live to turn anarchy into order and run your startup like a well disciplined military regiment. Your way is always the best way and although those you work with might view this steadfast determination negatively, you are there to make money, not friends! There is incompetency all around, but you accept that not everyone can be as perfect as you are. In your opinion, your co-workers should be grateful that you are there to help steer them in the right direction. Your startup is most likely involved in something which requires a methodical and precision organisation - though not a cleaning service, since you never mix business with pleasure. Founder’s Quote “Rules help control the fun”.

Ross Geller...*Correction Dr Ross Geller- You strive always to be a vision of professionalism exuding an air of seriousness which is befitting the unparalleled importance of the work that you do. You are incredible knowledgeable about your work and always try to give those around you the benefit of your superior intellect, even if they haven't asked for it. Although you may not show it, you are incredibly self conscious about what other people think of you, however more often than not your performance slips and they see you for the bumbling, but lovable geek that you really are. Founder’s Quote “Pivot!”

Gladys (You know Phoebe’s scary ‘woman coming out of the frame’ painting)- As a founder you are only just beginning to come out of your shell and have begun to picture yourself as the success that you may one day be be. Your progress is feared by your competitors who reckon that with you in frame they will be under threat. You know however that your idea has legs, and plan to do everything you can to stand on your own two feet.

Gunther - Within the startup world you are something of a wallflower - rarely seen but constantly busying away. Your work is not the flashiest, nor the most noticeable - you are certainly not going to be featured on the cover of Business Weekly anytime soon but you provide a valuable key service that is often under appreciated. Still, you work away looking on at the startup ‘in crowd’ - not getting noticed much but determined to do your best anyway.

Ugly Naked Guy - You are the founder of one of those annoying, flash in the pan, pointless, sensationalist apps which come in a heartbeat and die equally as fast…horrible and crude, but you just can't help but look!

Russ - This is the startup founder whose business is merely a poor imitation of an original idea, like the apps we see springing up all over the internet attempting to piggyback on the success of prior much more superior apps of a similar name. Your tenure will probably be short-lived as people begin to recognise you for what you are.





Gandalf (as in Ross and Chandler's friend who never arrives, not as in ‘The Grey’) - This is the person whose startup reputation precedes them. Those who meet you think the sun shines out of your nose and spend a long time telling anyone who will listen about how amazing you are! But you are the like the proverbial blue moon, the rarest of startup founders, often spoken of, but almost never seen.

If you have enjoyed our scientific examination of this most pressing of issues, you might like to take a look at some of these equally important posts.

Shakespeare’s advice to the startup community

Pitching- Do you have a biscuit strategy?

The Brain of an Entrepreneur- Finally dissected

What does your choice of coffee say about you as a startup founder?

If your startup was a movie, which movie would it be?

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Published on: 31st July 2014